Today I witnessed the most violent death that I ever have, and ever hope to. It was not a murder, but an accident. It was not a human death, but rather, an animal. However, it was a violent death nonetheless. I hope never to witness such an event again, or personally be involved in such a tragedy.
I was driving down the interstate to get to a work appointment, and a pretty strong deluge was in play. The usual 70 miles per hour speed limit was limiting all vehicles to a more reasonable 50 to 55 miles per hour, as the windshield wipers on all vehicles were on high swipe, or at least should have been. Despite it being three in the afternoon, the dark overcast skies were much more reminiscent of dusk, as the occasional lightning streak would illuminate the black-gray clouds above in the typically awesome display of nature.
Just ahead, perhaps a mile or two, you could see the skies clearing and I was looking forward to seeking asylum from the onslaught of rain for safety purposes and, ironically, being able to accelerate back to the ol’ 70 mph speed limit mark again. Traffic was pretty heavy due to the rain as well as it being a commercial area with a mall and a very established business district. The cars in all five lanes began to accelerate back to more normal velocities, myself included.
Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I saw what took me a moment to process. Is that a dog? Yes. Indeed, it was a large dog, perhaps 70 to 90 pounds, that resembled a German Shepherd, at least in part. I saw its profile, looking around in confusion at the fast-moving vehicles on the interstate. S/he continued to trot along across the highway, and the car to the right of me honked at him, swerved slightly, and successfully avoided him. The dog continued its trajectory toward the center of the interstate, and came into my lane. I, too, successfully avoided him as I instantly checked my driver’s side mirror for clearance and swerved slightly to my left into the fast lane to avoid him. Now that I was in front of him, I watched in my driver’s side mirror in hopes that he would be safe at least during the stretch of highway that he was still within my visual range.
He proceeded to cross into the high-speed lane, the left-most lane, and instantly was struck by a white Hyundai mid-size SUV full-on, hitting the front bumper on the passenger’s side. The driver was probably going at least 75 to 80 miles per hour, as I could see she was gaining on me slightly at the time.
His body instantly shattered into what looked like a thousand pieces! It reminded me of works by surrealist Salvador Dali, with paintings of figures exploded into segments. It was an incredible sight and terribly disturbing. Instantly I yelled in horror as my heart went into the shocked panic of staccato anxious beats. After about 15-seconds of oh-oh-horror-expletives, I simply grasped my head and rewound the image I had just witnessed over and over.
The unlucky driver of the white SUV instantly slowed down a bit, but remained in the fast lane for half-mile or so, then cut over three lanes and eventually into the slow-lane. I am still not sure if she knew what she had hit, as it happened so quickly. By this point on the highway, the lanes decreased back to four across the width of one side with off-ramp exits branching toward various semi-suburban areas.
Despite being in the slow-lane, she still gained on me over the course of several miles, and I couldn’t help but be curious as to what reaction I may be able to discern from her, even considering slowing down to be nosey and take a quicky-glance in her direction. I felt guilty and was tempted, but never had the opportunity, as she had gotten off the interstate, perhaps to check out the damage to her vehicle.
The SUV bumper was made out of the typical hard-shell plastic, and this thing was cracked heavily. I was surprised to see that it had no noticeable trace of blood or marks on it, however. It had a long vertical crack along the front of the bumper on the passenger side, but it appeared that the forward velocity of the vehicle at that high of speed simply exploded this dog in his/her entirety in that same forward direction. Simple physics, I suppose. Nasty. Poor ol’ dog… The sole comfort I can seek from witnessing this awful event is to think that its suffering was limited temporally, as the event occurred in less than one second: from the point of impact to the complete physical dislocation of all essential body parts that comprise life as a complex physical entity. Goodness! I truly hope that its ability to process pain was limited to a spectacularly short timeframe. I didn’t see what happened to the dog’s head, except that from the vantage point of the driver’s side mirror, the dog’s entire body comprised no more than two centimeters or thereabouts as a reflection on the mirror at impact. Hopefully the head, too, exploded nearly instantaneously…
So I reflected on this awful experience as I drove, and immediately thought to myself: you know, the fact that my life and social context in which I derive my reality allows me to think about this as seriously unpleasant is something to be acknowledged. I am not a child living in Iraq… nor Tunisia, Egypt, Libya, or countless other places in the world that witness atrocities of war and violence, some on a daily basis for their entire lives. But then again, there are certainly areas in the United States that have such incredibly disparate inequities that their lives are not far-off from the daily stress and strains of a war-torn world. Still, I am certainly not coming across dead bodies and smelling death and decay.
I also thought about the recent tragedy in Japan, where tens of thousands perished in those moments of terror, derived from the great earthquake and tsunami earlier this month. So many individuals lost, whose bodies have yet to be recovered, if ever at all! Speaking of Japan, what about the atomic bomb from 1945, during World War II? In an instant, people’s physical bodies simply disintegrated into elemental molecules and atoms as the intense heat from the nuclear blast simply obliterated those individuals who were within the immediate impact zone. Those poor souls who were just beyond that radius of what could arguably have been a welcome immediate death, suffered intense burns that resulted in skin that melted off the bone, eyes that fell out of the eye-sockets, and the curse of not dying instantly, as they endured their last pangs of life in utter pain and discomfort.
I witnessed the death of someone’s beloved pet dog, likely trying to find his way back home after becoming lost in the irrational matrix of human social “order”: the completely unnatural, socially constructed “concrete jungle” that I occupy and live within as though it is a natural manifestation. My experience of witnessing this event was terrible and awful. But when compared to the human suffering occurring concurrently around the world, thanks largely to politics and the already created momentum of the advancement of “progress”, my personal exposure pales in comparison.
Let us experience to the fullest those things which we are subjected to. However, let us also experience to the fullest those things which we do not choose to be subjected to. Life is unpredictable and full of variables that we cannot control nor even account for. Therefore the best one can do is to experience life as it happens, and acknowledge it. Sometimes, there is nothing one can do. Things just happen. If you’re fortunate enough to witness an event and survive, then accept the responsibility to acknowledge and deal with it. That is the primary human condition: survival within an unpredictable world. If you’re living your life in awareness, you’re ahead of the game: don’t take anything in life for granted. Easier said than done, but the returns are exponential for every moment lived fully. Accepting that life is forever partnered with death can only enhance one’s understanding of the ephemeral nature of life, and appreciating it for what it offers at any given moment.
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